How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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