How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize