We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize