Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
