I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
