my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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