you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
