So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
