not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
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