she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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