a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
