everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
