I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize