Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
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