i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
