ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize