I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
