ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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