He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
