The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
