Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
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