I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
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