Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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