Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
