Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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