(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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