I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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