I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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