He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
