very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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