Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
