He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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