Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
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