Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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