How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
