Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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