ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
