I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
