what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
