Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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