that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
