Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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