when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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