So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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