i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
