Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
