3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Randomize
