I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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