Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Randomize
