Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Randomize
