wakey wakey hands off snakey
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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